I just want to be normal

I’ve been really busy but saying I’ve been too busy to blog would be a lie. After all, I’ve had time to read something like 30 books (at least) since my last post, watch the Firefly series through at least twice, and discover Dr. Horrible’s Singing Blog. I had time to lose some weight, gain some of it back, and experiment with recipes that call for things like dried bonito flakes.

The whole Tiger Woods thing threw me off a bit. I kept waiting for my kids to make the connection between where I went to what they were hearing in the news.

Maybe. I don’t know. Whatever started it, being too busy, being afraid of being recognized, or maybe just being lazy; it’s not the real reason I haven’t been blogging.

It’s shame.

I just don’t want to be this person who blogs on this blog any more. I want to put it all behind me. Over four years and I’m still afraid to drink a stupid beer. Afraid!

I guess lately it’s just been kind of embarrassing to be this person who’s been to treatment, who goes to meetings, who is a … sheesh, I can barely even say it, a sex addict.

I think it’s kind of creeped up on me, this feeling of shame.



  1. I am so glad that you are back! My hubby and I have missed your writings so much! I hope that you are back to stay for awhile.

  2. I, for one, am glad that you did not stop. You Blog gave me my hope when my wife’s sex addiction was discovered. I was spinning off the planet and angry as a wet cat. It was your blog that gave me the understanding to forgive and begin this trip down recovery lane.

    My wife and I are both in 12 step groups and working our individual programs. Without your insights into the addiction and your subsequent recovery, I believe that my marriage would have ended this year.

    Thank you so much for being who you are. Whoever you want to be. Friday I will give my wife her 60 day SAA coin. We are closer than we have ever been and I credit a large part of that to you.


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