Well, today is better than yesterday was.
I’m thinking about doing a 90 in 90 (that’s going to 90 AA meetings in 90 days) but I don’t know. Yes it’s true that recovery is recovery. But I don’t feel like I belong in AA. Shit. I’d give my eye teeth to be a garden variety drunk. Yesterday there were several women in the AA meeting I attended. They were all nice. They passed around a meeting list and put their numbers on it for me. But if they knew what I was REALLY like . . . . You know, it’s addiction is addiction, but a sex addict cannot “bring the inside out” at an AA meeting. But my home group is a freakin’ two-hour drive and in over 5 years, I can count on one hand the number of times I haven’t been the only woman. Plus it’s a two hour drive. In the summer that’s not so bad, but in winter it gets dark early and the roads can be bad.
Here’s a good article about Internet porn: http://yourbrainonporn.com/doing-what-you-evolved-to-do